So, this would have been jimmyapos;s 62nd birthday.� iapos;ll call mom sometime before sleep and see that she is okay.� iapos;m sure sheapos;s gone over to the cemetery as thatapos;s her habit on personal days like this one.� it feels like heapos;s been gone for so long.� in some ways, i wish hopper did get to know him better.� i know he thought the world of her, and she liked him, too.� life is very different without him there at the house and sort of being central to everything the rest of us say, think and do. His absence has definitely affected the communications with each other, and itapos;s ironic how much glue he really was to our coming together as a family.� i donapos;t know whether i miss what we had or not.� i know i miss some of our old ways as a group, but iapos;m also doing so well now that i donapos;t think it would be a good place for me at this point in my life.� thinking of him brings up a number of memories. All of them are laced with optimism thankfully.� all but the last, which still has its affect on me up to this very minute. But, a happy birthday to jimmy even though heapos;s not sitting in his chair, eating ice cream and making remarks and conversation.� i tend to picture that nightly ritual whenever he comes to mind.� and just the other day i caught myself saying "from your lips to godapos;s ears" as he tended to do.� iapos;ve got other jimmy-isms in my language set.� itapos;s something that would have irked me years ago, but amuses me now.
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